Apr 26, 2013


Today is my last day with the company I've been with for the last twelve years.

When I started here, I was but a directionless failure at life. Had no real marketable skills outside of taking pictures and wrestling wild boar, and was unsure of how I would support myself. I was hired on, much to my surprise, with little knowledge of technology and the various products this corporation sold. Still they took a chance on me, and after a few months of contract work they hired me on full time, and finally I had what seemed like a career.

I had great benefits and a good working environment. I made many friends, and procured a few enemies along the way I'm sure, but my experience here as been a great one. I've learned many things in my time here that proved invaluable to me, even things not directly related to my daily duties. I'm a better person for having known a lot of the people I've worked with and they've all helped me grow professional and personally as well.

I'm truly grateful for my time here, but this new job offered me better benefits, pay, and the chance to expand my knowledge even further. So I sit here, bittersweet about leaving as I do like my job, but it was time to move on.

To new adventures....

"Choose a job you love, and you will never have to work a day in your life." - Confucius

Apr 19, 2013

You're not helping

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, 'Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping." - Fred Rogers

I believe the often missed children's' television host's quote will ring true as long as humanity still exists. When terrible tragedies occur, such as 9-11, Katrina, etc, there are many willing to give aid to the victims, sometimes making difficult sacrifices to see them get back on their feet and rebuild their torn lives. It's comforting to know that the work of evil is often outmatched by those willing to do good for no reward other than it's the right thing to do.

So in the wake of the terrible bombings in Boston many runners, public servants, and spectators ran into harms way to assist those wounded in the senseless act, and once again we saw humanity at its best. It's easy to dismiss the goodness of humans when you witness such naked and hateful aggression, but to see those who'll gladly risk life and limb to save others gives me the warm fuzzies. I can't help it, but it does, and it makes me proud again to be part of the human race, for there are more good people than not.

Still after an attack of this nature, we also see the worst in humans. After 9-11 and Katrina, many opportunists set up fake charities and sold merchandise to exploit the horrific events for personal and financial gain. Not to be outdone, conspiracy theorists and their nut job, mindless followers decreed almost immediately that this was the work of the government in some sort of false flag attack designed to rob us of our personal liberties and to make money for the corporations that have them in their pocket.

Now I hate giving the likes of Alex Jones and Mike Adams the attention they don't deserve, but they're doing a disservice and must be held accountable for their despicable "reporting" on the Boston Marathon bombings. Not content with recent media reports about the manhunt for the suspects, Infowars.com and the equally insipid NaturalNews.com, as well as countless others, have drawn conclusions, based on little to no evidence, that the government was behind the bombings. Everyone from police to the Obama administration apparently wanted to kill these people to do any number of scary things to the American public, but yet were so incompetent at covering up their involvement that somehow these theorists are on top of this.

It's amazing to me the ego of these people, and not just the morally reprehensible Adams and Jones, but their followers as well. They all feel they're smarter than us about everything, calling those who look to actual evidence to draw a conclusion as the none so clever title of "sheeple". Instead they want the public to draw a conclusion first, and then search for clues that are easily debunked to pad their warped thinking.

This kind of bullshit is doing a great disservice to the victims. The real perpetrators need to be brought to justice and soon, and no public servant should have their good names dragged through the mud to bolster someone's ego, nor to sell quack products and advertising space. Not only are conspiracy theories such as this a complete and total waste of time, but try to imagine actually being hurt in the blast or losing a loved one, only to have some moron with a grudge to pick with his elected government exploit it for financial gain. It's despicable and should not be tolerated.

So when you see someone talk or post about how they believe this story is not adding up to the conclusions they want, please feel free to remind them of how wrong they are. It's ok to ask questions of any investigation, but in this day and age where misinformation is easily debunked the truth should be told. The victims deserve as much.

Let's take one example of a FB conversation I'm having. One friend decided to post about a serviceman, Lt Nick Vogt, who lost his legs in service to this country. Conspiracy theorists have quickly determined that a man who lost both lower limbs in the Boston blast was in fact Lt Vogt, who for whatever reason decided to be an actor in the so called staged bombing. Of course this is a lie and a slap in the face to the injured soldier who gave more to this country than most. Lt Vogt sacrificed the use of his feet to serve us, and now his name is being dragged through the mud by sick people. When I pointed this out, no one responded, because they couldn't, and changed the subject swiftly, which was again easily pointed out as stupid.

The real man who lost his legs, Jeff Bauman, was instrumental in helping identify the current suspects, and we're thankful for that.

As for Lt Vogt, I apologize on behalf of all rational people, and this nation is grateful for your service. You deserve better than to be accused of being part of a heinous act, and I hope one day any and all people who claimed you were a willing participant in the Boston bombings at least apologize, or better yet, have their own legs amputated as repentance.

"I think the most and possibly only relevant question when it comes to whether or not a conspiracy theory will spread is, "Does this fill people's emotional needs?"" - Amanda Marcotte of Slate

Apr 9, 2013

We've come for the children

When you become a parent, you become really boring, or even a minor nuisance, to those without children. So often when I was single and childless I would hear complaints about breeders and how they were terrible parents and any little inconvenience they experienced at the hand of kids was paramount to being forced to endure a drug free root canal.

And yes, there were a few occasions I would witness the behavior of parents and shake my head, hoping that I would never become like them, but of course, as soon as my child entered the world I instantly became like all those that once annoyed me. I flood my Facebook friends' News Feeds with so many pics and videos of my daughter that I'm certain most have me on "hide". Instead of dining out on good local cuisine I meet friends, who are parents as well, at chain restaurants that cater to families and serving food that is neither interesting nor all that good. I eat dinner at 5p, so anyone that accompanies me to dinner has to be on the same schedule as that of a retired person. I make a poor drinking companion as I can't recall what it's like to sleep in past 8a and have to retire to bed by at least midnight.

But when I read complaints about parents online I have to wonder about a few of them:

  1. I was at restaurant/plane/theatre/etc and there was this screaming brat and the parents couldn't shut them up. Call CPS, for they're obviously failures at child rearing: If the parents made absolutely no attempt to calm their child, I can understand the annoyance and admit you have a right to complain about them, especially if they encourage the behavior, but if they do attempt to shut their noisy kid up and all their attempts are in vain, suck it up. If you are hearing this, chances are you're at a place targeted towards families, and there are many other venues or means of travel that'll lower the odds of you hearing a loud noise emitting from a wee one. It won't ruin the ambiance of fucking Olive Garden, so grow up and be glad you live a lifestyle that's consider lavish to 80% of the world's population. Getting a kid to quiet down can be as simple as asking Rick Santorum to donate money to GLAD. You can't reason with the unreasonable.
  2. Those parents didn't discipline their children according to my standards. Clearly they aren't suited to breed: This is something parents and non do alike, and I can understand it, but I've got a secret for you, kids are different and react to modes of discipline differently. Parents now live in fear of spanking, because godless communists will lock us up and take away our crotch fruit, so an immediate solution has been made more difficult. Sure there is time out and taking privileges away and all that, but to paraphrase Alfred, some kids just want to see the world burn.
  3. Parents are selfish because they're adding to the burden of the planet with an already non-sustainable population: That sound you hear is the breath taken from me upon hearing such eco-friendly wisdom. While this can be a decent point, it's made by douches who really like to sound like they're eco-warriors, but in reality they give two shits about the environment, and they know it. Now if the point was made about adopting a child who needs a home, well I can't argue that, especially being adopted myself, but really engaging in a biological act that'll help carry the species hardly seems selfish. If you really feel for those poor neglected children, adopt one, until then, don't make any judgments on my non adopting ass.
  4. I hate seeing all those photos of people's kids in my Facebook feed: You know what, I hate seeing those numerous posts of your political analysis, which is almost always stupid and pointless and it bothers me how you think you're smarter and edgier than you really are. I hate seeing those stupid quotes with accompanying drawings of people dressed from decades ago that are neither funny, clever, or insightful. I hate seeing those posts that tell your friends "This is why I (insert action that's supposed to make people be impressed with how much of an educated person you are of whatever the fuck subject you linked to). I grow tired quickly of hearing how your significant other is the best in the whole wide world. They're not, not matter how many times they put their dishes in the dishwasher or buy you a video game, or do any other task that anyone else could do just as well if not better. I'm sick of seeing all your damn pictures of dogs, cats, or any other animal doing things that every miserable beast of the same species does. I don't care what you purchased, eat, or visited. But you know what? I click like, because if any one of those behaviors make you happy, it does me joy to see that, because I'm your friend, and that's what friends do.
  5. Parents think they know everything: There's some truth to this, and it's made apparent with stupid mommy bloggers who hate vaccines and love alternative medicine and other associate nonsense, but these people are easy to ignore. And really they should be looked upon with pity rather than angst, as they're dumb people and haven't received the upstanding education you have. Sure there are the people who project some sort of smug superiority about being parents, but when I think about that, I've never met anyone like that in real life. Seriously, sometimes I wonder if those types only exist on the internet. Really, if you don't want to listen to a holier or smart than thou parent, it's easy not to, well unless you're their unfortunate offspring. Then it sucks to be you.
  6. Parents are responsible for everything that sucks in pop culture as they keep buying crap for their kids, like Justin Bieber tickets: Yes, I'm so glad your parents denied you the privilege of watching He-Man or Jem, and instead forced you to read Dante throughout your childhood, because that's exactly what you wanted to do. Since as a child you had such a refined sense of aesthetics, it only makes sense that the rest of the population follows your folks' lead. Oh and fuck off. Seriously fuck you for trying to take away a simple joy from a kid. You sucked as a kid, and you suck now. If your life is so centered around pop culture, then it's empty and hollow and meaningless. You really need to start examining what it is you bring to humanity, if anything.
  7. Parents who say "you have to be a parent to understand" as the end statement to their illogical behavior need to be punched in the face: OK I kind of agree, but I think violence may be going a bit far. Saying something to the effect of "by you stating that means your argument is groundless and has no basis in reality; therefore I win and you lose. Neener, neener, neener."
So yeah, non-breeders, kids run amongst you, deal with it. If you hate them, move to a retirement home and shut the fuck up.

"Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them." - P. J. O'Rourke

Apr 5, 2013

Another crazy encounter at work, as usual

I do like my job. I like how it always helps me broaden my skill set and gives me daily challenges to overcome, which can be enjoyable. But the people in this office worry me. Longtime readers will understand that I have strange encounters because a) God hates me b) I'm a freak magnet c) crazy folk love to get attention from Wiwille. Today was no different.

I was washing a dish in the work kitchen space, when I hear a man whisper softly into my ear that he liked my intensity. This conversation ensued.

Me: Uhhhh...great?
Him: I like how you wash that dish.
Me: As God as my witness no one has ever told me that, and you're really freaking me out dude.
Him: Yeah, I do that sometimes.
Me: What's it like being a weirdo?
Him: .....(walks off to gather his things from the printer).....

He went to the printer and solved his printing needs I assume. I sized him up, as I do most freaks I meet, wondering how this situation would go if things were to go all Hunter S Thompson style, but he didn't look at me and continued about his way.

I'm still a bit unsettled about the matter.

"A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?" - Albert Einstein

Apr 2, 2013

Wiwille goes hunting, ends as you would expect

I've been hunting before with results that were less than stellar. When I say less than stellar I mean I failed worse than Yahoo Serious' film career. I've never succeed at killing an animal, and maybe that's a good thing. I've never enjoyed deer, because it's not good. Spare me the whole "you just haven't had deer prepared or cooked properly." Yes I have what many have called properly prepared and cooked deer meat, and it's not good. No matter how many times you tell yourself it's tasty, it's not.

So a few weeks ago the family packed up and headed to Tyler Texas to visit some relatives on a spot of land they own which is about the size of Delaware. After some touring of the property, eating of a fine lunch, feeding cows, and shooting firearms, it was decided that some of us were off to hunt feral hogs.

Yes feral hogs. Currently estimated to be over 2 million in population in the state of Texas, the swine is considered a nuisance animal as it breeds rapidly and destroys livestock, farmland, various structures such as fences, and humans. The state of Texas is dedicated to reducing the population of the pigs to a reasonable level that they pretty much will allow anyone to kill the miserable creatures. You can even hunt them without a license, so long as you have permission from the land's owner, which we obviously had. You can use pretty much any weapon you choose, from knife to any legally purchased and owned firearm. Some farmers and ranchers will even pay you to roam their property and bid good riddance to the animals, and thus a cottage industry was born.

So my brother in-law handed me an Bushmaster AR-15 (yes the very same model used in the Sandy Hook tragedy) and told me that would be the weapon I would use should we come across any hogs. He loaded up a .45 caliber piston, and he and his young cousin piled in the back of a sport utility vehicle with me, similar to that pictured below:

Because nothing says getting closer to nature than being escorted around in an internal combustion vehicle.
The youngest didn't pack heat as she was just more curious about the affair. Her uncle loaded up his firearm and sat in the passenger seat while Al, the relative we were visiting, drove us into what seemed miles from civilization. We kept our eyes fixed on the wilderness before us, ready to take aim and fire upon creatures that wouldn't hesitate to feast upon human genitalia.
We saw some deer, which weren't worth shooting, but it was cool seeing those majestic creatures do deery things, such as run, jump, and repeat the process over and over again. We saw ducks and all kinds of fowl take flight onto the horizon, and we saw huge tracts of land. What we didn't see is a single hog. I never even took aim with my rifle at any point, which I guess is just as well. I'm not that good of a shot, so I can't speak with 100% confidence that I could hit a charging hog, but I can say that I would of, because I'm awesome and have many moments of awesomeness.
So again, I have failed to do the one task asked of someone hunting. There was no bacon for us that day, which is really depressing when you think about.
"I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it." - George Bernard Shaw