Mar 13, 2006

A tale of a waitress and two clueless men.

Corey, aka Butters, and I were hunting for a place to grab a beer and found ourselves at a local Renton sports bar. We walked into the place and sat outside awaiting our waitress. Out walks our waitress and to our joy she was really pretty. Tall, brunette, shapely, and a gorgeous smile she donned frequently.

Her name was Tamara and she was a friendly gal who enjoyed chatting it up with us as we ordered more and more beer. Butters decided to use his "do I look like a Corey or a Jason to you" line, which he uses as an opener often. See Butter's first name is actually Jason, but he prefers to go by Corey. I sat back and enjoyed seeing my friend mildly flirting with her. I stayed quiet so not to move into territory that would take attention away from him.

Anyways Butters and I talked about how cute she was when she was out of ear shot and decided that this should be a regular hangout. We liked the food and beer and the eye candy was nice. Always good ingredients for me to come back to a place.

We arrived a second time to which Tamara greeted me by name. Kind of surprising since I've only been there once. Butters was taken aback by the fact she didn't use his considering they had a conversation about it. We ate and drank and then decided to leave. Tamara said goodbye to me, and again called out my name.

A third visit came and again Tamara greeted me by name. This is what made Butter's head swirl. He sat me down quickly.

"Dude," he said. "She used your name again."

"Yeah," I replied. "She probably remembers it from the credit card."

"Dude we had a whole conversation about my name and she's never used mine. I think she's into you."

"Nah, she's just being friendly. She's a waitress and she's hot. She's looking for big tips," (which ironically was working).

"Dude I think she's into you."

"Nah she's too hot to be into me. Besides you're better looking."

"Dude she's into you. You look good since you've lost the weight. She remembers your name, not mine."

"No way dude. She's not into me, but I do like the image."

We went back and forth arguing about whether this cute waitress was into me. He actually started convincing me that she was kind of digging me. It helped that every time she came by she would always use my name when taking my order or asking if I needed anything. I was actually starting to side with Butters.

"What do we do if she's actually interested in one of us?" I asked Butters. "Would you be offended since you like her as well."

"No man," he replied. "Would you?"

"Nahh," I said. "Lets make a pact. If she likes either of us the other will have no hard feelings."


Butters was still trying to instill the belief into me that Tamara was legitimately flirting. I was skeptical, especially since most girls would rather have Butters than me; however I did have a glimmer of hope. We talked about when I would make a move or at least ask if she was dating anyone. She didn't wear a ring, but I figured most waitresses wouldn't. I admit I felt sleazy thinking about hitting on a poor waitress who probably sick to death of receiving passes from guys all the time. Picking up on a girl while she was working seemed wrong to me.

She came by, but still I didn't make a move. I got up to go to the bathroom and when I made it back to the table I was hit with a shocker. Butters announced that the other bartender came by and he asked if Tamara was single. The bartender told him that they were engaged and getting married in September.

I was crushed, but we laughed like hell thinking about the long conversation and detailed planning that went into Tamara. We knew we were clueless men, but the reality of her dating situation hit home and made us think. Serves me right for thinking some hot waitress was just waiting for someone like me to walk into the place.

"The real judges of your character aren't your neighbors, your relatives, or even the people you play bridge with. The folks who really know you are waiters, waitresses, and clerks." - Anonymous

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