Jan 28, 2008

Taste death live life.

Well it snowed last night and as usual everyone in the Seattle area is panicking. People are calling in sick due to adverse weather conditions and some are just too skittish to brave the flaky roads.

I for one love driving in the snow as it's anarchy in the streets. I enjoy the excitement to see if someone will hit me as after all I am insured. I know some people don't have much experience with wet snow conditions and I can't fault them for being careful. We don't need a bunch of panicky people out in conditions such as this, but sometimes I wonder if they really know how to taste death live life.

I say brave the snow. Do it naked with no cell phone. I know Seattle people can't really drive anyways as the idea of traveling at 60 mph is a scary concept and using a turn signal is shown as a sign of weakness, but still you need to man up folks. It's only a half inch of snow. You drive slow anyways so what's the big deal? Oh are you afraid of the big bad hill? Is it terrible to ask you to downshift and drive at a steady pace?

Listen up Seattle drivers. I'm tired of your nonsense. You really need to take some time to educate yourselves on how to operate a motor vehicle responsibly. Driving the speed limit through a tunnel is not a difficult nor frightening task. Merging does not require you to come to an almost complete stop. Slamming on the brakes is not the best solution in most cases. Most people tend to believe that they are good drivers, but you're all lying to yourselves. Instead of abusing your children take some time to know your car and how it works. It's for the greater good.

You can do it. I believe in you.

"The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers." - Dave Barry


Foster Communications said...

Those Seattle pussies wouldn't last a day in Minnesota...

Anonymous said...

Foster's got a point... Seattle pussies... Hehehe...

I hate driving in the snow. I love walking in after a long day. My neighbourhood looks beautiful when covered in fresh snow at night.

What scares me are the people in regularly snowy regions (like Toronto) and still drive like its a sunny Summer day when its a snowy Winter day.

Grace said...

We had a snowfall so bad a few weeks ago, the snow was thigh-deep. Now there's a reason to drive crappy.

There will always be those people who drive too slow, and those who drive too fast. Everybody should learn to drive perfectly... like me :D

rawbean said...

Strangely, you've actually been in a car with me when it was snowing here in Vancouver and I was driving...crazy! I drove to work today because I knew the bus would be a nightmare (oh it snowed last night).

Mattbear said...

I actually couldn't make it to work because the road from my place was closed in the morning due to ice.

Regardless, I hate driving in snow. I drive slow in snow, even in my 4x4, because I don't like sliding or crashing. And to Minnesotans and other midwesterners who say we're wimps...you don't have the amount of hills and shit we have here. It's a whole different deal driving in the snow here.

I hear a lot of complaining about how bad Seattle drivers are - mostly from Seattle drivers - but the truth is, 85% of people driving anywhere in this country suck at it.

Anonymous said...

Seattle ain't got shit on Atlantic Canada. We haven't seen the pavement since November 15th.. Well maybe I'm taking that a bit far? Our winter tires are on about 9 months a year. ..Seattle pussies!