Dec 16, 2008

Wiwille's Christmas list

I was speaking with my folks the other day when they asked me what I want for Christmas. Kind of a difficult thing for me to answer as I'm in no way a materialist and the items I really want to see under the tree are a little out of their budget. I hate asking for things, especially useless items, so I told them to just buy me a nice dinner and some drinks.

Reflecting on that conversation I came up with many things I'd like to receive on this merry holiday so today I'll detail what I want for Christmas. For those interested in giving Wiwille a present (no one) I suggest you read closely.

Lightsaber: No I don't want some plastic crap sold at your local Target. I want scientists to stop working on things they consider important, like curing cancer and curbing global warming, and concentrate on what the human race really needs and that is a real working laser sword. Of course I will be the first to receive and test one.

Anne Hathaway: I hear Scarlett is spoken for.

A chance to enter the ring with Vladimir Putin: Call me a glutton, but for some reason I'd like the fight the tyrannical, martial arts obsessed, former KGB agent, and current elected dictator of Russia. Wish me luck.A trip to meet the people listed on my 'Blogs by people I've never met': Whether it be drinking and eating bad food with WIGSF, racing go-karts with Alyssa, having Big Ben take me to his favorite local strip club, debating music with Scott, and/or getting hammered and singing bad karaoke in front of Jlee I think the stories that would arise from such visits make for good blog material.

There are a few more on the list, like wanting to punch any executive who has given the green light to an Ashton Kutcher or Uwe Boll film, but I think I'll stop for now. Wait a second, I also want to punch anyone who believes Sarah Palin would make a good President. Oh and I want a flame thrower and a katana so I could be like a hybrid GI Joe-like ninja/fireman. They would call me Firebird and I would fight the evil that is Serpentor.

Yes you can make this a very special Christmas for Wiwille.

"Christmas is a holiday that persecutes the lonely, the frayed, and the rejected." - Jimmy Cannon


wigsf said...

I heard that Anne Hathaway has a thing for Italian bullshit artists... so get in line bro.

Scott said...

Ah, Anne Hathaway. Good post Scarlet move.

Mizzle said...

@ Scott-
Indeed, I would say Anne is an upgrade.

Kelli said...

I'm sure Anne knows how to use "atrophy" correctly in a sentence ... plus, she hangs with Jimmy Buffett. It doesn't get much cooler than that.

And I'm a little offended I didn't make the list of "blogs by people I've never met" ... hmph.

Claire said...

What Kelli said. Yeah, and what Kelli said.


JLee said...

That would be great. I'm sure karaoke would be quite entertaining! I've met a few bloggers and almost got to meet another next month in Denver, but can't make the trip. It would have been fun though.

Big Ben said...

I'll come to your state, watch the Jays smash the Mariners and we'll get more lap dances than we can afford.