Epulor

I was at a work cook out today and was volunteered as the grill man. I set up my briquettes and placed steak, hot dogs, and vegetables on the grill and started to cook away. The smells of fire and beef started to engulf my nostrils and the fever of charring meat ran through my brain.

Grilling makes me horny. I'm not sure why. For some reason every time I start to cook beef on a fiery grill I change. I suddenly want to be wearing a loin cloth and have topless women feeding me grapes while I flip meat.

It goes on. For whatever reason I imagine myself staring at the hills of Rome with sword in hand.

'Farewell to treaties, from now on war is our judge.

Hail Caesar. For those who are about to die we salute you!'

Okay maybe the vegetarians are right...or not. Screw them. Beef rules. Candy ass grass eaters.

I shouldn't drink around coworkers.

"Cowards die many times before their actual deaths." - Julius Caesar