Mulierositas

Often times I hear from women that they're upset with the media and their fascination with all things skinny. Complaining about all things obsessed with unrealistic beauty standards most females I know are always quick to slam magazines and blogs that do all to promote a diet that requires one to eat nothing but ice cubes once per day.

What's fascinating is how often I hear about such loathing for modern media outlets while a lot of the same girls will gladly support the industry. It doesn't make any sense to me at all. It's like hating oil companies and....oh wait...

Well I guess it's dumb to compare the energy industry with something so superfluous as fashion magazines, but you get my point. Since you're reading One Bad Apple you've already proven yourself to be a savvy intellect already.

Kelly Clarkson, who you probably won't remember from American Idol, was recently featured in the magazine pictured above. I know nothing about 'Self', the rag she chose to appear on, or what their mission statement is, but the editors decided that their cover girl was a little too plump. As is common with print media the masters of Photoshop decided to shave a few pounds off the singer digitally.

Of course this happens all the time. When I was a photographer I would cover blemishes of grooms who were covered in pimples due to sticking their face in the cleavage of sweaty strippers the night before. But I digress...

Controversy did arise as many who follow the celebrity noticed that she's much heavier in person than what is portrayed on their magazine. The editors of Self responded to the criticism claiming that they're there to "inspire women to want to be their best".

My ass. They simply couldn't say 'chunky girls don't sell magazines. Women are often more cruel regarding the looks of their gender than men and we accommodate this stupidity to the demands of the market. If girls really wanted to see realistic standards of beauty then we'd hire Lane Bryant models. We simply sell a magazine and readers have...get this...a choice to support us. If you want to see a tubby Kelly Clarkson then we'd give you photos of her bathing in a vat of butter eating cheese cake. Now excuse us while we snort cocaine with hundred dollar bills."

I've said time and time again girls that men, well real men anyways, like girls with some curves. We don't want a woman with the body of a ten year old boy. We don't expect, nor want, you to be perfect. Call me a chubby chaser all you want, but I would so hammer this:

Yes I would disappoint her in ways that would seem almost criminal.

I digress again...

Seriously girls stop buying this trash. You're only doing a disservice to your gender by giving monetary support to this. Let future females be happy with their curves and if you do want to look better put down that Big Mac and hit the gym.

I'm with the prophet Sir Mix A Lot when it comes to the ladies.

"Did we alter her appearance? Only to make her look her personal best. Did we publish an act of fiction? No. Not unless you think all photos are that. But in the sense that Kelly is the picture of confidence, and she truly is, then I think this photo is the truest we have ever put out there on the newsstand." - Lucy Danziger, Editor-In-Chief, Self.

Self Editors Explain Covers Aren't Supposed To Look Realistic