Our state fair is a great state fair...

This weekend I attended the cultural mecca of the Republic of Texas and that is the State Fair. In my days in the Northwest we looked upon the fair with wonder. It was known as the Disneyland of its kind filled with cheesy rides, weird food, and livestock as far as the eye could see.

Upon entering the gates I was amazed at how large it truly is. Sure everything is bigger in Texas, but the scope of this fair can take one's breath away. In Washington they have the Puyallup fair, which is large, but the one here in Dallas dwarfs it.

We wandered around and took in the sights and sounds. Fairs are great places for people watching. We saw all kinds of mullets, people with bizarre fashion sense, and everything associated with multi-cultural trash. Still people were there to have good clean fun and fun they had.

The three of us decided we would eat our way through the fair. We started with the world famous Fletcher's corn dogs. I'm not a fan of those, but these were better than the ones I remember eating in middle school. We then ate some deep fried tamales, which were bland and something I swore to never consume again. The highlight was the chicken fried bacon. Yes you read that right. It was truly an experience that can best described as awesome.

There were other foods we decided to try. The pork chop on a stick tasted like a pork chop. The fried margarita was a sham at best. The deep fried beer was disappointing and the sweet jalapeno fried shrimp was interesting. I guess I had higher hopes for the cuisine, but maybe next time I'll be more discriminating.

There was a large elaborate car show where manufacturers showed off their newest models for everyone to sit in and possibly buy. What was strange about this is that they offered them at a price higher than the MSRP and even advertised that fact just in case you felt like spending more on a car at the fair then at your local dealer. It was cool seeing the latest in automotive engineering, but really I got an overall 'meh' feeling as we eyeballed the vehicles.

Oddly enough the three of us walked by what looked to be a television crew filming an event. Upon closer inspection it was none other than Larry the Cable Guy taking part in a fried PB&J eating contest. Yes I got to see the hero of the mouth breathing white trash community. Kelly even got a picture of him interacting with his fans.

After watching a dog show and making our way through the crowds the girls decided they've had enough of the state fair. I wanted to see a bit more to see if there was something I missed, but that thought quickly left my brain as I reasoned there was little that would be of any interest. After seeing all the merchandise being sold so far I assumed it would be best if we left and digested all the deep fried goodness.

So my first trip to the fair was less than stellar, but I'm excited to go back one day and ride one of the world's largest ferris wheels. Perhaps when I have kids it'll be more fun as well.

"You may all go to Hell, and I will go to Texas." - Davy Crockett