Now this is a platform.

This mid-term election has seen it's share of high drama. Some are just unusual political ploys, such as Lieberman's run as an independent, and some are just freaking sick, such as Mark Foley talking dirty to minors. There are others of course such as the crazy antics of Katherine Harris and Mike Arcuri's taxpayer funded phone sex calls.

Republican State Assembly candidate Chris Migliaccio has brought an interesting platform to his campaign that may seem unorthodox, but his passion has to be praised. What is it you say? Get to the point you rambling lunatic you might think? Okay here you go.

Mr Migliaccio wants our public educators to teach masturbation. Yes much like the once disgraced Surgeon General he believes that it would be a good idea to have a teacher describe to your children how to pleasure themselves. His main argument is: "You are less stressed and a generally happy person and less aggressive when you masturbate on some sort of regular basis."

Maybee so. He does go on to state that masturbationn will leave people less desperate for sex and therefore may not engage in activity that may be physically or emotionally harmful. He actually talks about the dangers of using vasalinee on your pink parts which he feels the schools should point out to the children. Call me a prude, but having a teacher describe to me how to spank it would be scaring enough.

Now since I never engage in the art of pleasuring myself...umm...yeah...anyways I find the point that masturbationn generally makes you happy to be flawed. If that were true men would never be depressed. Ever. My friends would be the happiest people on the planet.

He does make some interesting, if not unrelated, points. He goes on to say: "In high school, only one in ten blowjobs are reciprocated with other oral sex. That's terrible. That suggests that girls are being taught that they ought not get equal rights....Women deserve the same thing. I don't think this is that crazy."

You hear that girls? Demand oral. Do it now I say. Fight for your rights if not for yourself then for womanhood in general.

"Our country talked about masturbation more in December of 1994 than they ever have in the history of the country, and you know, people would think you'd be embarrassed about that. I'm not embarrassed about that." - Joycelyn Elders

A Daily Politics Endorsement: Chris Migliaccio (with video)