Sep 21, 2008

Elivs lives...

Mawwiage. What a delightful institution where people of like minds come together in holy matrimony to express their love in front of people who are eager to feed their bellies and consume spirits. I've been to so many weddings a lot of them seem like a blur, but last night's will stick in my mind for many years to come.

Andrea and Justin shared nuptials yesterday in what was quite possibly one of the most unorthodox wedding I've ever witnessed. When you consider I've been to over 200 of them that's saying a lot. Each member of the bridal party came walking to various songs, but Andrea brought the house down when her and her father came strutting to 'Brick House'. A crowd pleaser for sure as people in attendance were hooting and sharing in the joy.

The officiant was dressed as a female Elvis impersonator. I'm not kidding folks. She did a well scripted ceremony incorporating the King's song lyrics into her delivery. Tears were flowing from the bride as she made her vows to Justin. Overall it was very sweet and as someone said that evening, it was just so 'them'.

After they announced the couple as officially married my friend Crystal turned to me.

"You're going to blog about this aren't you?" she asked.

"Oh you know it," I replied.

Let me back track a little.

I'm sitting at a table with friends waiting for the ceremony to start when I start to receive text messages from a girl I've been seeing. Rather than pick up the phone and call me she decided to let me know her lack of feelings for me by the more modern approach. Feeling a little down and wanting it to not show I decided the best idea would be to consume my own body weight in alcohol.

Good times were had as I just tried to maintain a straight line and speak coherently. The speeches then came and were made by each and every one of the bridal party, then the DJ asked if anyone else would like to say something.

Oh my. My head is spinning in beer and vodka and there's a chance to make myself the center of attention. This could be a recipe for disaster. Don't go up to the mic Erik. Just don't do it. Make a good decision for once in your life.

If you honestly believed that rational thought would prevail I'd like to welcome you to my blog. I always like new readers.

My speech went well I thought. People laughed a lot and there was a large 'awwww', but honestly I was so out of my mind drunk the crowd could've been heckling me and I would've been none the wiser. Dancing ensued and conversations were had. I was having a good time, but I wasn't sure if I was offending anyone with my seeming inability to maintain any sense of sobriety. I didn't get punched though, so things went well.

The bride asked for a dance and I was happy to oblige. During it she confessed her concerns about how the night would appear on Erik's Ramblings. I assured her it would be an honest portrayal, but I left out the fact that it would be seen through the goggles of someone swimming in booze.

I did have a great time though as everyone else seemed to as well. Luckily after much concern about my state of intoxication I got a ride home. This morning I wasn't sure if I was hungover or still drunk. A friend took me to get my car today and thankfully it was still there. After a nice lunch on the pier I drove away grateful that I got to witness nights like that. I've never seen my friend Andrea look more happy or more beautiful.

I still have no idea how much I drank.

"Man, I really like Vegas." - Elvis Presley


Anonymous said...

Isn't it nice how everything we do becomes material for the blog? Whether we do good or bad, come out smelling like roses or get shitfaced and end up taking a leak in the roses; it all gets the blog treatment.

Anonymous said...

It was very us wasn't it? I am glad you had a great time and your speech WAS great, you made people laugh and "awwwww". Thank you for 7+ years of friendship and for being my "personal mover" I love you to death! xoxo

Scott said...

Nice to see happy friends getting married isn't it, and I too love when people get married in a unique fasion that is 'so them.'

Miss Ash said...

A wedding with some character I love it!!

As for the text that's a really awful way to do it, sorry to hear, but at least you enjoyed yourself anyway!

Claire said...

200 weddings? Dude, you're like a character in a chickflick. A very drunk character in a chickflick.


PS Awesomely the first three letters of my word verification for this read 'gin'!

Mattbear said...

Holy crap, I had no idea about the text messaging. That blows, man. For what it's worth, I think you're better off. I really wish I knew a nice single woman I could set you up with.

It was a fun wedding, and I certainly had a good time.

Kelli said...

Mawwiage ... nice Princess Bride reference ... Text-girl doesn't deserve you anyway.

JLee said...

A breakup text?? When you're at a wedding no less?? COLD! Hopefully there is some video floating around of you at the wedding that will end up on YouTube. ha