Jan 6, 2009

He can't do that

Working graveyards can have it's effect on the psyche. Sometimes you're burning the midnight oil alone with no one to talk to and you find yourself starting to go mad. It's lonely on the night shift and when I would toil away at the long hours signs of insanity would creep in.

When all friends went to bed and could no longer keep me entertained via IM I had only myself sometimes to keep me company. The thoughts when you're alone vary and can go into weird territory. At times I wondered if the day crew would find me underneath my desk shaking while mumbling how Bono is leading a world wide conspiracy to enslave the world and making them chant the them song to 'Land of the Lost' while doing origami, the planet's new currency.

Usually it wasn't that bad. Normally there would be another teammate to talk to. The security guards though were not as lucky. Their main task was to walk around the building over and over again making sure everything was safe and nothing was on fire. Constantly alone they would find amusing ways to entertain themselves.

We had one security guard who was an interesting chap. He wore makeup for reasons unbeknownst to me. He had a strange walk and always had a smile on his face. He was a pleasant gentleman and like to make conversation with another coworker of mine. I swear this protector of the company had a huge crush on him.

I was walking to the elevators where I see our valiant guard step out of one. He didn't even see that I was there and as he made his odd strut to his destination he said in a voice that I swore could be heard in Canada 'I CAN'T DO THIS'.

He then sees me, freezes, and in his best Keanu voice says 'whooooooaaaaa'. We lock eyes for what felt like forever. Still not moving a muscle he wishes me a good morning. I just keep a smirk and tell him hi. He then gains his composure and walks on past me.

I saw him often after that incident. He still maintained his smile and would always say hi to me. I wonder whatever happened to that silly gent for he seems to be no longer with us. Just like the popsicle guy he vanished one day never to be heard from again.

"Control your life through insanity." - Cliff Burton


Kelli said...

Very interesting ... everytime I think of a night watchman, I think of Tackleberry from Police Academy.

Anonymous said...

I worked the graveyard shift for 8 months and my mind and body has still not recovered properly. That was 9 years ago. It was the start of my insomnia.

I used to be normal. I think.

Scott said...

Thank god I have not yet had to be a midnights guy.

Pablo G said...

Yes, he was a very strange lad, it seemed as if he had walked out of a Queen video.

Mattbear said...

I loved night shift, and miss it greatly. Never saw this security guard you speak of...he sounds...interesting.

Waaaay back in the Ridgewood days, we had a night security guard named Dave. He was the nerdiest, most useless security guard evar. Joey could have overpowered him with one hand tied behind his back, I swear.

He used to hit on my wife and any other female who worked late. I loved nothing more than strolling over while he was trying to chat up my wife - it made him visibly uncomfortable.

JLee said...

What the hell??? haha
We had a security guard who was a kindly old man that we found out later had worked with the CIA and had been shot several times and spent time in a Russian prison. I always wondered why he walked with a limp? True story.