Oct 20, 2009

Claudus

I did a bad thing today. I used the disabled stall at work.

Actually I'm not sure if that's a bad thing or not.

Businesses accommodate their consumers and employees by giving them allotted parking spaces that suit various needs. By law they must give a specific amount of disabled parking depending on the size of the lot. A grocery store I frequent even gives a spot for pregnant women so they don't have to trek far while carrying their future spawn. Malls and amusement parks have gone so far as to allow families to have the best parking spaces so the little ones don't have to walk far and get any exercise.

Taking a disabled parking space when you have working limbs is often seen as a no-no of the highest order. People will berate you, cops will fine you, and you'll be perceived to be in a league reserved for people who drive slow in the left lane.

Today I was in the bathroom at work and the small stall was occupied. I enter the large stall normally reserved for people who need the assistance of a large metal bar to sit and stand. While it's not specifically marked for the disabled it's often assumed that it's for the needy. For whatever reason as I sat and gave the bathroom my gift of petal scented poop I imagined a gang of men waiting outside ready to beat me with crutches while tossing colostomy bags in my direction.

"Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in." - Rita Rudner

6 comments:

wigsf said...

When leaving the large stall, pretend to limp.

Kelli said...

Have you run out of blog material?

Miss Ash said...

Well here's my thing, I'm dead set against able bodied people using parking spaces meant for others...but the bathroom that's a different story.

I mean if there was a huge lineup and somebody with a wheelchair came in I wouldn't be like "get behind me in line for your toilet" but i'd certainly use one if it was free and noone was waiting for it.

Mattbear said...

This question was actually raised in the MicroNews (back when there was actually a hardcopy version). A disabled individual replied and basically said, "Hey, if the other one's full, use it...if I come in while you're in there, I'll do what anyone would have to do - wait."

Mizzle said...

You are going to the special level of hell...reserved for child molesters and those who talk during movies.

People driving slow in the left lane is an ecouraged practice around here...

Pablo G said...

When you gotta go... But the parking spots, leave those alone. The "able" people I've seen parking their cars in reserved parking for the "disabled" are low class and trashy.