Yesterday I was part of an email thread between my wife, my brother-in law, and his fiance. Russ was notably absent for the most of the communications, which was just as well. It was concerning our plans for New Years Eve. Below is an excerpt:Kristy: Maybe they will have a concert at Billy Bob's. Show Erik how to "BootScoot" :-)
Me: You may be shocked to know that I actually do know how to Boot Scoot. There may or may not be video of the sad event.
Kelly: Honey, I love you! I danced with you @ Ernie's . Sadly, there is not evidence of this Boot Scooting. We need to practice more. ;)
Me: I think we may have different interpretations of this Boot Scoot. I'm talking about the white trash fad of the early nineties where congenial folk stood in a line and followed along with everyone else to the twangy talents of Brooks & Dunn.
Kelly: That is called line dancing. Boot Scooting is more like 2 stepping or 3 Stepping. :)
Kristy: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Me: So if one does the Boot Scoot Boogie it's called line dancing, but if one 2 or 3 steps to whatever song of their choosing it's boot scooting.... I'm a very confused individual who is Texas retarded. I think this state should require it's own cultural literacy program before they give you your driver's license.
I think a little background is in order regarding my incorrect interpretation of this boot scooting all the kids are talking about. Years ago I finally convinced a girl that going on a date with me was actually a good idea. She invited me to join her friends to do some line dancing.
Ye gods it took all I had to not hang up the phone and light it on fire, but a gentleman was I so I thought I'd buck up and try it. I concluded it might be fun.
There was no second date.
So today dear readers I bring you the song that I learned how to line dance to. It never was a good tune and time has not been it's friend:
"I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'." - Bob Newhart
3 comments:
Bootscoot sounds too much like some fecal matter left on a boot after giving a deep asskicking.
When my nephew got married to a native Texan, his brother-in-law-to-be came up for the wedding. One day, a bunch of us went paint-balling. Afterward, we were sitting in a cafe eating.
The brother of the bride was talking about back home, and going dancing a lot to meet girls. Not able to pass up a chance to poke fun at a Texan, I said, "So, line dancing is the mating ritual for y'all then?"
"No, I hate line dancing."
"So, two-step, then?"
"Yes, of course."
I burst out laughing, and he couldn't figure out why.
It reminded of me of the dialogue from "Blues Brothers" -
"What kind of music do you usually have here?"
"Oh, we have both kinds - country AND western!"
Well if you do ever learn to boogie scootie whatever it's called, make sure there's a video!!!
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