Things that make me feel old.

I recently entered the local Hollywood video to check out a movie about an hour before they closed. I walk in and hear blaring rap music. I turn to look at the clerk who bolted to the stereo to turn it down. She turned and looked at me, smiled, and then turned it back up.

What was she thinking? Did she think I look young? I'm 31 for god's sake, but yet she felt I was young and hip enough to enjoy music that's peppered with intelligent lyrics such as "yo niggaz". I shrugged it off then went about browsing the shelves, but after a while the music started getting to me.

Ye Gods I'm turning into my folks. No I wasn't standing there thinking to myself that it's no wonder the terrorists want to destroy us, but I just found loud music that dedicated itself to the "n" word, senseless violence, and the objectification of ignorant women got old real quick. If it was background noise that would be one thing, but to have it hammered into my brain over and over again was annoying.

I picked up my movies and headed to the counter. I was somewhat happy that there was no line given the fact that I wouldn't have to hear such horse shit for much longer.

Clerk: Did you find everything okay?
Me: Word up.
Clerk: ..(long pause)..uhh great.
Me: Fo shizzle.
Clerk: ....uhh...not a fan of rap?
Me: Ehh some.
Clerk: Really!! What do you listen to then?
Me: Usually I listen to metal, classical, or jazz, but mostly keep my music library dedicated to anything that doesn't recite a racial slur 47 times in one song.
Clerk: Oh.

The girl seemed really shocked that I didn't listen to rap. When she asked what it was I listened to she seemed to insinuate that there were no other music genres out there.

I was in my boss' office the other day and he had some R&B group singing about how much they're in love with some girl. It sounded like there were four of them singing.

Me: Is this Boyz 2 Men?
Boss: (laughing) No this is (insert R&B boy band here). Haven't you heard of them?
Me: Nope. Are they new?
Boss: Naw they're old school. What is this to sappy for ya?
Me: Naw, it just sounds a lot like Boyz 2 Men.

I dropped it at that. My boss is younger than me and I didn't need to age myself any more. Old school to him probably meant 1998. I think he was insulted by my assessment of his music. Yeah I'm kind of concerned about my review as well.

I always thought I'd grow up to be the cool adult, but really I just don't get today's youth culture.

"As I give thought to the matter, I find four causes for the apparent misery of old age: first, it withdraws us from active accomplishments; second, it renders the body less powerful; third, it deprives us of almost all forms of enjoyment; fourth, it stands not far from death." - Cicero