Sep 13, 2005

The most important news story ever.

A federal judge has ruled that Seattle's moratorium on the opening of new strip clubs is unconstitutional. Many women can now embrace their dreams of dancing naked on a pole, grinding some horny guys pelvic region, and snorting bad meth. The mafia is excited to have even more business fronts. Men can now find a new excuse to deplete their bank accounts for 5 minutes of attention from a girl who goes by the name 'Candy'. Women have another reason to leave their boyfriends and/or husbands. The judge's ruling works out for everybody.

RS, LO, and I went to Ricks for a birthday party once. Before we entered two girls asked if they could join us. Apparently the club will not allow women to enter the establishment alone. I guess they had too many jealous girlfriends attacking strippers.

We were seated and ordered our non-alcoholic drinks (Washington state law requires strip clubs to be dry.) The girls started asking us questions about the place and what goes on there. One of the girl's boyfriends went there a week ago and she decided to go and check it out. She bought RS a lapdance and sat next to him the whole time observing how liberal the touching rules are.

While they were gone the other girl and I started chatting. She received a huge shock when she saw her best friend's girlfriend dancing on stage. I guess the 'dancer' told her boyfriend she was a waitress. Drama then ensued. The cell phone was whipped out and the boyfriend was informed of his girlfriend's occupation. Poor bastard.

The girls stood up and made their leave. The looks on their faces made it obvious they were not happy with what they saw. I guess I was partly responsible for the break ups of people I hardly know. Sucks to be them.

"People always ask me, did I ever learn anything when I was a stripper? Yeah, I did. One man plus two beers equals 20 dollars." - Anna Nicole Smith

Seattle could soon see more strip clubs

1 comment:

Big Ben said...

No alcohol, that blows!!

You should have paid for the girl to get a lapper and see how much she got touched.