ATF kids.

My parents were school teachers and for a long time and I conjured myths about exactly what they did. I imagined my Mom baking cookies and reading stories to the children. I believed Dad when he said he had his children goose stepping to the recess playground.

The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms set up a kids drawing contest where children drew images of what they envisioned their parents do at their ATF employment. The results are comedy gold. Listed below are a few examples:


Tia's mommy throws people in jail where you will get sick. In true Dante fashion the prison has this inscribed on their entrance. Mommy is also well compensated for this position and the suspects are very cooperative. When hearing about their impending arrest the suspects lets out a "Boy oh Boy."


Dixon's dad arrests 12 year old children who burn down churches and have no fashion sense. The adolescent arsonist also carry devices only sold in places like the Love Pantry.


Jori's folks first handcuff people then whip out their guns and then and only then tell the criminals they're under arrest. Conveniently the crimes are committed right outside a prison.


Katie's bald daddy is a lawyer for the ATF and has to deal with a half asleep dumb ass jury and Judge Mablean Ephriam of Divorce Court fame. Katie must be brought up with a optimistic view of the justice system.


Morgan's dad monitors snowboarders for the ATF. I've never packed when hitting the slopes, but apparently it's a federal issue.


Little Garyn here believes that mommy has taken over the task made famous by Jesus of having the whole world in her hands.

"Don't bother trying to join the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms. It turns out they're apparently against all three." - Wiley.

Kids art contest